If you dont get your priorities straight, your life will fall apart

If you dont get your priorities straight, your life will fall apartIf you dont get your priorities straight, your life will fall apartI have a friend who, in all outward appearances, is doing extremely well in his life.Hes making millions of dollars. His fame and reputation are spreading far and wide. He is brilliant and seems to know all of the answers.But then, I just found out last night that hes been going through a major divorce.He has a few kids whom he loves, but who he hasnt been around very much to play with.There is a common notion that you can have it all. Its a very seductive idea. But its not true.The fundamental core of the word decision means to literally cut-off alternative options. When you choose one thing, you simultaneously close the door on many others.This is why making decisions is so hard.A true decision involves risk, opportunity cost, uncertainty, and commitment.True decisions involve couragebecause it takes courage to commit to something beyond your own mom entary feelings. It takes courage to commit to a future filled with unknowns.Thomas Monson once said, Choose your love, and love your choice.Ive seen over and over in the past year how easy it is for people to walk away from their marriages. The honeymoon phase has long since passed. Their relationship has gotten slightly apathetic. They arent investing in the relationship like they once did.The grass begins looking much greener ALL OVER THE PLACE.The thrill of a new and exciting relationship (or project) starts to fill the mind.Why is a new relationship so attractive? Because its all future.The longer youre in a relationship, the more past there is in that relationship, and thus, the more likely you are to fall into patterns.Unless you are continually creating a future that is bigger than your past, your past will be repeated in the futureand that is how things can get boring pretty quickly.When you first start something out, its incredibly easy to be flexible. Youre willing to do practically anything for the relationship. You want it really bad.But after time passes, do you still approach the relationship that way?Or, since you have it now, have you stopped prioritizing your relationship?Its extremely easy to fall into this trap.Its easy to fall into patterns where you stop truly investing in a bigger future.Life gets busy.Youve got to pay the bills and do all the stuff. It can be exhausting.But life was busy before and somehow, you found all sorts of creative energy to invest the relationship.What if its not about the busyness of life, if were really being honest?What if youve just gotten too busy with other things?What if your mind is just somewhere else?What if youve gotten lazy?What if, now that you have what you want, you want something else?Its easy to drift.Only when the relationship comes to an abrupt end, like in my friends situation, does it become painfully obvious about what had slowly been happening over a number of years.If you dont pay attenti on to your life on a daily basis, it will absolutely drift in directions you may not like.You have to be completely clear on your core priorities.If youre not completely clear on what matters to you, then you dont have direction in your life. You dont have values. Your life will be a ship in the ocean without a sail or compassjust following the wind.It is not a priority if youre not investing in it.It is not a priority if youre not thinking about it.Its not a priority if youre not pouring time into it.Its not a priority if you dont love it deeply.Its not a priority if you dont have a vision for it.What are your priorities?What evidence is there that what you just thought about actually is a priority?How much have you invested in those priorities in the past 12 weeks?Of all things, relationships are some of the easiest to take for granted over time.If your key relationships arent something youre approaching with a beginners mindsetas you did when you were first trying to establish th e relationshipthen the relationship is probably not a priority to you.That may be weird to hear.It is highly likely that your romantic relationshipno matter how much you say and think you love this personis not actually a priority to you.If the relationship is not a priority, then that relationship has drifted into an apathetic patternand apathetic and boring patterns dont have a lot of life. If your relationship doesnt have life, then it will likely end.One, or both, of you, will begin looking for life and future and possibility somewhere else.You cant have many prioritiesJim Collins said in Good to Great, If you have more than three priorities, you have none.That may be a little extremebut it also brings up a good point. If you are focused on many different things, then you arent really focused at all.Focus requires zeroing in. It means making a decision.If youre focused on several different things in your life, in which direction are you actually going?If youre focused on several different things in your life, is it possible you actually have misled yourself? What if youre not really going where you think you are? What if youre actually drifting, and you havent fully committed.It takes courage to be committed and to make decisions.But without courage and commitment, you can never develop confidence.What are your priorities?Are you clear on them?Are you investing in them?Are you willing to give up a lot of other things to ensure that your true priorities are where your mind and heart are?If not, then you probably dont have priorities. And without priorities, you dont have a clear future that youre creating.Ready to upgrade?Ive created a cheat sheet for putting yourself into a PEAK-STATE, immediately. If you follow this daily, your life will change very quickly.Get the cheat sheet hereThis article first appeared on Medium.